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What’s On My Mind Isn’t In My Heart

Posted on Monday, March 8th, 2010 at 9:17 pm in Blogging, Life, Romance by MJB

Ok, I can only state exactly what it is that I am looking for.

For starters, I’m ready to get married, I don’t have time for games, and I’m not into casual relationships.

I am not suggesting I want to get married tomorrow, what I am saying is that I am marriage minded, and if you can’t see that kind of life, if “forever” isn’t enough, then please move on to the next.

It’s just like I said it earlier, I am so done with the adultery and fornication, I’m so no longer the pimp and playa, I’m going to be a one woman man. Yes, when I make that vow, when I commit, it will be fo life, ’til death do us part.

So, let me state what it is exactly I’m looking for, and what I expect in a relationship.

I’ve stated it before, communication is very important to me, for various reasons. Without communication, it’s difficult to know what both the husband and wife are thinking and feeling. It’s more than just saying hi and asking how was your day, it’s getting to know one another, speaking about personal, private issues that we may be dealing with as individuals. The husband and wife are to grow closer to GOD through each other, and that’s not possible to do without communication.

Yes, I will call my wife, I will check up on her, but that’s not because I don’t trust her, it’s because I care about her, and want to make sure she’s doing ok. I’m the kind of man who may call out of the blue just to say I love you.

We may only talk for 5 minutes, we may not say much, but I’ll still tell you I love you.

If you don’t like a man to say that he loves you, then you’re probably not going to like me in a relationship. The difference between myself and others is that I don’t just throw that word around lightly, if I say it, I mean it. The difference between myself and others is that I love the Lord our GOD first and foremost, I love Him with ALL my mind, and ALL my heart, and ALL my soul! I love my brothers and sisters (all humanity) as I love myself, and even more than I love my own self, if that makes sense. Do I love myself? Yes, I do, but I love others more.

So, now that you know that about me, let’s get into some specific details. I have a strong libido, and if you don’t have a strong libido, it may be difficult for us to come to some kind of compromise in the bedroom. I’m the kind of man who loves to please his woman, and goes out of his way to make sure she’s satisfied. It’s 68 and you don’t owe me anything!

I don’t mean to be so blunt, but that’s just how I am, I am very blunt, I don’t have time to play games. Yes, I love to make love to my woman, I love to make her orgasm. Just as I am perfecting my skills with technology, I want and need to perfect my skills when it comes to making love. Sex? Anyone can have sex, that’s easy. Making love? That can’t be done without love, without some kind of emotional and mental involvement. Yes, I can easily make a woman cum, I’m not trying to lie on my d**k, I’m just being open and honest. I tell you this, though I do have experience, I haven’t really been with a woman in over three years, so I need to practice often when I get married, so that I can build back up my stamina and endurance. Practice makes perfect, and I wanna be that kind of man who knows how to please his woman, and knows what she needs from him. I love it when a woman makes the first move, it don’t take much to get me hard. A simple kiss, a simple touch, a simple look, can give me an erection that could break a 4×4. If a woman doesn’t make the first move often, if she’s shy and timid, then I can be gentle, and take my time, I will make the first move eventually, but I prefer to wait until she makes the first move, that way she knows that I’m not trying to pressure her or rush her, I want it to be when she wants it, I want to make love to her when she wants me to make love to her. Will I lead? Absolutely! Can I be dominant? Yes. I can also follow, and I can be submissive, I am versatile. I will tell you though, if I make the first move, and I get rejected, I may wait a while before I try again. If I try again, and I get rejected again, why then I’ll wait even longer before I make a move again. If I’m rejected a third time, then I’ll stop trying, I can go months without it if I really have to. If a woman wants to play that kind of game, if she wants to put me on time-out, and wants to see how much I can take before I just take it, then I suggest she not go there with me, because I’ll win that game.

Obviously just talking about what we each like and don’t like, talking about our sexuality, talking about what we could try, is also important to me. How can I know what pleases you if you don’t tell me? How can I know if you want me to go faster if you don’t let me know? Talk dirty to me, and I get turned on. The more turned on you get, the more into it you are, the more turned on I get, and the more into it I am. That’s just how I am.

So I want to snuggle afterward, I want to hold a woman, I want to caress her body, I want to talk about it afterwards. If you don’t like that, if you’re not into men who are just as affectionate after making love as before or during, then don’t think about marrying me. Otherwise, I’m just putting it out there, I’m just being real, open, and honest, since I seem to have become some kind of famous.

Damn, right now I’d love to be making love to a woman, but since I’m not yet married, I gotta stop thinking about making love to a woman. Right now my mind’s in the gutter, and I don’t want to get it out, I wanna dwell on these lascivious thoughts. I wanna get dirty, I wanna get nasty, I wanna get kinky, but I’m alone and I’m not going to just go out and have sex. I’d rather wait until some special woman marries me, so I can truly say that for at least some period of time I have indeed been saving all my love for her.

What’s on my mind now is sex, but what’s in my heart is love.

What’s on my mind isn’t in my heart.

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Perfecting My Skills

Posted on Monday, March 8th, 2010 at 3:49 pm in Business, Technology by MJB

I know I don’t think like most people do, most people think about what I don’t think about, and I think about what most people don’t.

I’m different, I’m unique, I’m a Visionary with Vision.

I’m still perfecting my skills, I’ve got things down to a science even without really being trained or taught. Right now I’m waiting for the Easy Transfer to finish copying all the data that was on about 4 hard drives (those I hooked back up to my older system that still was running Windows 7 on it) to some of my newer hard drives in the new system that just has Windows 7 on it.

When I get finished with that (that was the most important thing to me, I need to salvage my data, I’m trying to keep a digital library and archive all the information and data that is available, which is an impossible feat with a limited budget, and only one person handling all of it, that person having other duties and responsibilities as well, and daily is helping others and solving other people’s technical problems), I can finally begin to do some much needed testing and learning. I need to first install VMware Vsphere on my server, so then I can load up any operating system I want to, and create several virtual machine images, that I can then boot into on my workstation. That way, I won’t have to have a multiboot configuration on my workstation, I can just use the local virtual cloud I’m going to create. I’m about to download Visual Studio 2010 RC so I can also get back into programming. Of course I’ll install the latest versions of Ubuntu and Fedora, I might even install SuSe Linux, Solaris, and BSD. I’ll try to figure out how to get OSx86 up and running as well, so that way I can utilize the most common operating systems, and continue to master them. If I had the money to purchase a Mac, I would, but I’m struggling right now, I still need to get a few more things for my own network, such as a UPS for the server and router, another UPS for my workstation, and a decent PCI Express video card for the workstation. Since the onboard nVidia chipset offers SLI, I’ll stick with an nVidia GPU and chipset, rather than using an ATI one.

So here it is, on the hardware side of the house, we’ve got Intel and AMD competing with each other in the desktop microprocessor market, and both of them are competing with each other and IBM and Sun Microsystems (or should I say Oracle?) in the server microprocessor market. We’ve got ATI (now a subsidiary of AMD), nVidia, and Intel competing with each other in the motherboard chipset (whether North Bridge or South Bridge) and GPU market. We’ve got several companies who manufacture motherboards, but the main ones are Asus, MSI, Gigabyte, and Biostar. We’ve once again got several companies who manufacture video cards, but discrete video cards have mainly either the nVidia or ATI GPUs now. Of course several companies are manufacturing memory (whatever formfactor and technology), but the main ones are Corsair, Kingston, Crucial, Patriot, OCZ, PNY, and Ultra. The hard drive and storage market has been dominated by Western Digital and Seagate for years, with Maxtor coming in third, but along with the advancements of technology (solid state drives) comes new innovation, and new marketing opportunities, so some other companies such as Centon, Transcend, Patriot, and OCZ are making headway. Power supplies are a tricky thing, of course names like Cooler Master, Thermaltake, and Ultra top the list, but some other companies are also manufacturing good power supplies. I’ll leave some of the accessories alone, and get into the software side of the house.

Microsoft still dominates the desktop OS market, but various flavors of Linux are really starting to take hold, such as Ubuntu, and Slitaz. On the server side, you’ve got to think about the difference between proprietary code and open source code, and think about the TCO. It might be more cost effective to go ahead and migrate over to an open source platform, such as Fedora, and then hire some full time techs to handle the maintanence and administration, because keeping a Windows Server platform up and running, and updated, can get salty. Apple’s still being hard-headed and stubborn, and not offering a legit license to install OS X on a PC (since it’s basically all the same technology now, Apple can’t try to differentiate between Macs and PCs. PCs with either Intel or AMD processors in them CAN run OS X just as proficiently as Macs can.). I have no idea what Sun Microsystems (or Oracle) is planning on doing with Solaris. Will they just leave it alone, and only offer support, and focus on Oracle DB, and Java? IBM’s been a longtime advocate for Linux, and I think it’s not very wise for them to keep AIX limited. AIX is a very stable, very proficient server OS, and if I was IBM, I’d think about taking it to a whole new level, and making it compatible with the x86 architecture, not just PowerPC. Sure, I know that means alot of rewriting and recompiling of code, but I see AIX as a powerful, robust, stable, secure Unix based operating system that could indeed compete with other mainstream Unix operating systems in the enterprise, such as Solaris and BSD.

Adobe will no doubt continue to improve upon the Creative Suite series of programs (Flash, Fireworks, Dreamweaver, and a few others were only added into Adobe’s vast arsenal when they bought the intellectual property rights of the code from Macromedia), and Autodesk will no doubt continue to improve upon AutoCAD series of programs, as well as 3D Studio Max and Maya. Digidesign’s Pro Tools is still the industry standard audio recording and engineering program on the market, and that’s not because of the actual program Pro Tools, but because of the hardware aspects (96kHz sampling rates). Final Cut, Logic Pro, Digital Performer, Audition, Sound Forge, and Nuendo are viable alternatives to Pro Tools, but some of these programs only run on Macs, and some of them only run on PCs. A recording and engineering studio would have to figure out which would be more proficient to run, by comparing the costs of each platform, and the advantages and disadvantages on the technical side and user-friendliness side.

Now, don’t tell me I don’t know the industry I am in!

I read this and thought that maybe my name should have been on that list. I mean, I did really well in A.P. Computer Science as a Senior in High School, I did indeed write a program in Pascal that would figure out the derivative of a function. I breezed through C.S.S. in the Marine Corps, I easily mastered my job, I was indeed building servers and workstations, installing operating systems, preparing them for deployment, and hooking up, administrating, and monitoring secure and unsecure networks in the Marine Corps. I became very proficient with building test workstations when I was working at AMD, testing processor / motherboard chipset compatibility / reliablity.

I wonder when I’ll be taken seriously. I’m a freaking tech, I know what I’m doing, I know what I’m talking about!

Well, I’m perfecting my skills, I’m still learning, I’m not saying I know everything about everything about the I.T. industry, but I certainly know a whole heck of alot. See, I’ve got over 16 years professional, real world experience solving complex technical problems, so though I don’t have any degrees, or technical certifications, nobody can say that I don’t know what I’m doing, and don’t know what I’m talking about.

But today I’m just going to take things easy, I’ve got to finish cleaning my room, and finish up with salvaging a massive amount of data, and consolidating the library. I’m the only one doing it, but I’m still being called to help others with their technical problems. I can only do so much by myself!

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Kicking Myself

Posted on Monday, March 8th, 2010 at 1:46 am in Business, Life, Math, Romance, Technology by MJB

Sometimes I kick myself for even creating a profile on a site which costs a pretty penny to become a member. Now why on earth are they charging so much for? I’m sorry, but while I think it’s nice that the internet has allowed individuals to communicate with one another instantaneously, and I think it’s wonderful that men and women can use this avenue to get to know one another “virtually”, I’m also very upset with how much some people use this advancement to get paid.

Now look, I know a business is in business to make a profit, I get it, everyone has to eat. Still, I think spending $69.99 a month to get a certain type of membership (so far, every email I’ve gotten says I have to have a silver membership to read and reply), is kind of steep, and that’s not including the one time fee of $68.

So again, I refuse to spend my hard earned money this way, I am not too happy with the individuals who run this site, I personally think the individuals are being greedy, instead of trying to offer a valuable service.

Ok, let’s just say, for argumentative purposes, that either all the women profiles are fake, or the women don’t have to pay to send out email. Let’s say that from the first month the site went live, 10 suckas took the bait and paid to masturbate. So, that means that just that first month the individuals running the site made roughly $1,380. Now, let’s just think about that for a moment. Let’s come up with some estimates, let’s think about how much it costs to be able to host this site. A good site that is designed from the ground up, from the designing aspect to the coding and scripting aspect, could indeed run a couple grand. Ok, now, a good server to host the site is going to run at least a couple grand. You’re gonna need a decent connection to the internet, your bandwidth won’t be so heavy on the download side (unless you’re using it for other purposes besides the site), but will be heavy on the upload side. Well, you’ll probably want to get at least a T1, and I saw an ad for a company that’s offering T1 service for about $250 a month (there’s a three year contract). So, take into consideration a few other things, such as registering the domain name (it’s a business, if you’re smart, you’ll register it for at least three years, that’s about $100), and having a backup server for your secondary DNS server aspects and site shadowing and caching (say another $2 grand), a UPS (battery backup), and of course you’ll have to think about the electric bill, and where you’re going to store the server at.

If we add all this up, then we’ll say there was an initial cost of $10,000 to get things up and running. Now, the estimated gross revenue generated the first month was based on just 10 people paying for a one month membership, plus the one time fee. The first month comes and goes, and we’ll say out of those 10, half of them pay for another month. Some new customers come in on this second month, we’ll say another 10, and half of them pay for the first month and the initial fee, and the other half get the discounted two month plan (plus one month free). Well, add it up, you do the math, now we’re looking at about $2,370.

Now here’s where things start to get interesting.

The site takes off, and now 100 people pay for the quarterly special. We’ll say the site has been active for a quarter, that last month was about the same as the month before, so we gotta take into consideration that in three months the site has generated roughly $7,000. After we add in the newly generated revenue, we’re talking about an amount just under $30,000. Well, the initial investment of $10,000 has been paid off, and our monthly overhead costs of about $500 Can easily be met. After the first 6 months, there should still be at least $15,000 sitting in a bank account collecting dust. Or at least, if these numbers were to be realistic, that would be the result.

Are they realistic? Yes and no. First of all, this was just a rough estimate, for educational purposes, and second, there’s always going to be unforeseen circumstances and overlooked expenses, and third, there’s no way to know, for sure, that the site will generate that kind of revenue. Still, with the way technology is, you can cut out alot of the initial costs, go directly through a major hosting site (like a server farm), and look around on the net for any free PHP or Pearl scripts to handle whatever it is you need done (i.e. shopping cart). Of course there’s sites online where you can pay for scripts, and you can either get web templates to do the dirty, grunt work for you, or you can always try to find a hosting site that offers predesigned and custom designed web templates.

In other words, I know enough about the I.T. industry, and how things work, to know that the price for a membership to this site is not just outlandish, it’s a rip off.

Look, I really do want to chat with those who have sent me messages (if they are real people), but I’ll continue to be hard-headed and stubborn.

This wouldn’t have been an issue if I was married.

See, I’m still my own worst enemy!

Oh well, one of these days I’ll find love, one of these days I’ll run across a woman who will actually want to converse with me if I ask her to call me. One of these days I’ll run across a woman who will actually want to marry me. Or maybe, just maybe, I already have.

I know one thing, I know with GOD, ALL things are possible, so I’ll just put my faith and trust in Him.

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Laid Back & On Track

Posted on Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 10:44 pm in Blogging, Business, Life by MJB

Someone sent me a message on this internet dating site I have a profile on, and though I cannot read the message because I haven’t paid for a membership, the subject of the message is “Are you laid back?”

My answer?

Yep, I’m laid back, I take things easy, I try not to stress out too much, the only stress I have in my life is lack of companionship and intimacy. Other than that, everything is all good in da hood in my neck ov da woods.

I cannot begin to tell you how wonderful today’s service was, you just had to be there to really experience it, no amount of words can describe it. After church I came back home for just a little while, and then left again to go on a service call.

I found out the hard way that some Toshiba Satellite A205 laptops are having issues, for some reason all of a sudden the bios puts a password on it, and you can’t even do anything after that. No, no backdoor passwords for a Phoenix BIOS worked, no, no backdoor passwords from Toshiba worked, and you can’t boot up into anything, the first thing it asks for is the password. You can’t even get into the bios to change anything.

After taking the whole laptop apart, and examining the entire motherboard, looking for the CMOS battery, I finally got fed up because I couldn’t find it, so then I began searching on the net for any information or solutions I could find. Yes, I tried taking out the battery and the memory, and holding down the power button for at least 30 seconds. Yes, I tried shorting the two leads on the board (by the XX engraving) to short out the bios, but that didn’t work either.

Well, I finally decided to call Toshiba, and they’re going to send out a box to put the laptop in, so my client has to ship it to Toshiba, and they’ll fix it, thankfully for free since it was a problem on their end, not from the end user.

That took me a while, and I also had to remove some spyware and viruses on a netbook and an older Dell PC.

Yes, I’m laid back, but I still stay on track!

I’m still being consistent and remaining persistent. I’m not going to give up, I’m not going to call it quits, almost everyone I interact with tells me to give it a shot, they encourage me and suggest I do indeed run for the office of President of the United States in the 2012 election.

Hmmm!

What could that be about?

Is it possible that word has gotten around, and more and more people are becoming aware of just how much the Lord has blessed me?

Well, it sure seems that way, my newest client said I was highly recommended by some people he knows.

Word of mouth advertising is STILL the best form of advertising! I spent about $100 on a stack of business cards about 2 years ago, and though I’m about out of them, here I am, two years later, and I’m so busy that I can barely keep up with the workload. What did I do? Well, I just kept staying on the grind, since I couldn’t afford to pay for some conventional advertising campaign, such as an ad in the newspaper, or an ad on the radio, instead I let my work ethic speak for me, and let word of mouth advertising do what it does.

I tell you this, if anyone is thinking about starting their own business, or already have, I know from experience now that word of mouth advertising does the trick as long as you are truly customer service oriented, and make sure your customers are very well taken care of.

I’m laid back & on track!

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A Rebel’s Redemption

Posted on Sunday, March 7th, 2010 at 3:34 am in Good News, Life, Theology by MJB

I don’t know what lessons will be brought up during the preservice lecture and service sermon later on today, but I’m quite certain it will be beneficial to the well-being of my soul. There’s just something about being around true, loving, caring men and women of GOD, and worshipping and praising Him together, as a family, that uplifts my spirit, and I’m always filled with good spiritual food whenever I attend church. Then again, that’s the difference between those who go to church because they want to, because they want to learn and grow in the Kingdom of GOD, and they want to be faithful to the Lord, and thus go there expecting to be given good spiritual food, expecting to be blessed, expecting great miracles and healings; compared to those who go either out of habit, or are there just to look good, and show up to make an appearance, rather than to truly serve GOD.

Oh yes, there are definitely wolves amongst the sheep, so I advice you to stay rooted and grounded in Christ, to stay seeking first the Kingdom of GOD, and stay in the Word of GOD, praying for spiritual discernment, so you will be able to know what is true, and from GOD, and what is false, or lies, and are from either mankind, or the enemy.

Now of course you could say that alot of the things I write about are not from GOD, so I advise you to not even trust me! ONLY TRUST GOD!

Well, this last week I was really bad, so though I’m in a great mood now, I’m sure I’ll be in tears later on today when I am in the Presence of the Lord.

Despite my falls this last week, and my whining and crying, things are starting to go really good now. I found an unused PCI Express video card laying around, so I took all the parts from my older system and put them together, mounting the motherboard on a piece of wood that is being used as a makeshift desktop. Doing this is strange, and it wouldn’t be a good idea to have some contraption like this laying out in the open if there are going to be children around the area, but in this case it’s in the basement, in a secluded area that usually only I frequent, so it should be safe. Actually, this will help with airflow and cooling, because there’s going to be a vent really close to the location, that will help keep things cool during the hot summer days. During the winter, it gets really cold down here in the basement (heat rises of course), so though it was really nice earlier yesterday, the temperature has dropped dramatically, and now it’s freaking cold outside again! I’m utilizing my rice heatpad that a dear friend made for me. It’s even got my name embroidered on it!

But e nuff about all that, now here’s a random Passage from the Word of GOD.

Good morning! GOD bless!
________________________________________________________________________


“If you had one sheep, and it fell into a well on the Sabbath, wouldn’t you get to work and pull it out? Of course you would. And how much more valuable is a person than a sheep! Yes, it is right to do good on the Sabbath.”

Matthew 12: 11 – 12

P.S. I am not trying to take this Passage out of context, read Matthew chapter 12 verses 1 through 13 for the proper context, I’m just using this Passage to illustrate a point. Of course what we here in the West understand about the timing of the Sabbath (or day of worship) is different than those in the Middle Eastern areas (those who claim to be Christian or Jew). It need not matter whether it’s from sundown Friday to sundown Saturday, or even on Sunday, the Lord created EVERY day, and He just wants us to put Him first in ALL of our days! So, we are indeed suppose to take a day of rest, and worship and praise Him on that day, He created everything in 6 days, and rested on the 7th. Nevertheless, we who are not under the old covenant, which lead to sin (knowledge of the Laws of GOD leads to sin) are under a New Covenant, we have been grafted into the Family Tree of GOD when we accept Christ Jesus as our Lord and Savior, and confess with our tongues that He was crucified, died, and was resurrected.

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Dat Knew, Ancient Style

Posted on Saturday, March 6th, 2010 at 10:57 pm in Blogging, Business, Life, Marketing, Music, News by MJB

Now look, what I’m about to write here is meant to be taken seriously.

First of all, I have to make sure that what I write is based on facts, and from what I’m hearing, from what has gotten back to me through the grapevine, I could be looking at going on an international, world-wide tour with some very Gifted, talented artists, producers, and musicians, a few of which I personally know.

Of course I’m going to look out for those who have looked out for me. Of course some people get mad love and respect from me, people like GOD’S Black Diamonnd, Lights Out, K-otic, Bitty Bang, K-Love, Almighty R.O.B., Gem-n-Eye, all of the members of Ecliptic Switch, Skin-n-Bone$, PatricJ, S.O.N.-One, C-Ray, Mikado, Ability, Joe Bell, Mojamz, Spooky Slim, and about a thousand other very Gifted, talented individuals who I have interacted with, and grew close to, over the years. I know their real names, and they know my real name. I ain’t trying to highside, I’m just showing some love to my people. I’m not saying everyone mentioned here is going to be going on tour, I’m just giving a shoutout to a few people I know.

All I know is, doors are being opened, not only did I become aware of this possible tour, but I also heard about someone being featured on a project soon to be released. Ain’t nothing going to stop us now!

I don’t know about you, but I know the Lord our GOD is who has been blessing me with favor, so I’ll give credit where credit is due.

Dis is Dat Knew, Ancient Style.

Peace!

One Love!

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Taking Compliments

Posted on Saturday, March 6th, 2010 at 5:46 pm in Blogging, Life by MJB

Over the years, as I’ve grown closer to the Lord, I’ve actually became a person who doesn’t like compliments, if that makes sense. While everyone needs to know they are worth something, and are special, and unique, and are doing a “good job”, I myself don’t want the praise, or the compliments, direct your praises and compliments to our Heavenly Father for blessing me like He has. He’s who deserves the Honor and Glory, He’s who deserves the praise and worship, He’s who placed in me these Gifts and talents I have.

Yes, I do appreciate getting compliments, it makes me feel good about myself when I know I’m making a difference in this world. I gain self confidence when I know I am helping others, and putting a smile on others’ faces. I am filled with Love, Joy, and Peace when I know that somehow I have helped someone, and they tell me thanks, or tell me I did a good job. It makes my life easier knowing that I’m doing the right things, that I’m on the right path. Of course I veer off that straight and narrow path every once in a while, don’t we all? Haven’t we all made mistakes, bad choices, and poor decisions in our lives? Aren’t we all still making mistakes? Aren’t we all sinners who fall short of the Glory of GOD? That’s the thing though, because of what our Heavenly Father has done for us, though we do sin and fall short of His Glory, we are able to stand upright before the Lord because of our faith in Christ Jesus (Yeshua, Yahshuah, Isa), the Son of the Everliving GOD, the King of kings, and Lord of lords, the Promised Messiah, the Lamb of GOD who takes away the sins of the world.

So, if you have any complaints, then please direct them to our Heavenly Father. I’m quite certain it will get back to me, the Holy Spirit ALWAYS convicts me of my sins, and thank the Lord for that! However, if you have any compliments, then also direct them to our Heavenly Father for blessing me. Praise Him, don’t praise me. Worship Him, don’t worship me, I’m not GOD, I am a human, I didn’t create the Universe and everything in it, I didn’t take upon the sins of mankind, I wasn’t crucified, and I wasn’t resurrected. Applaud our Heavenly Father, don’t applaud me!

That’s a problem I have with politics in America, we put these supposed leaders who are suppose to be leading us up on a pedestal, as if they are GOD or something.

I tell you this, I don’t support the current President and his administration, but I’m certainly not going to say the former President is some innocent saint who’s getting a bad rap either. That’s why I really don’t like the Human Events emails that get sent to me, they’re still trying to play the partisan card. They want division, not unity. They kiss the former President’s behind, but hate the current one, and the current one is just as bad, if not worse, than the former one.

But it’s funny, I’m walking on a thin line in regard to politics, I have many clients who are supporters of the current President, and voted for him, and want him to get re-elected, and then I have many clients who don’t support him, and didn’t vote for him (nor John McCain), and don’t want him to get re-elected. I state my opinions, perspectives, and perceptions, I let it be known that I’m still planning on running for the office of President of the United States in 2012, I explain why I don’t support the current President, I explain the Truth about the Federal Reserve, I describe America’s TRUE history regarding her battle against the international bankers, I tell others about some of the things Abraham Lincoln and his administration faced, as well as JFK and his administration, and others, and I try to tell the Truth, the whole Truth, and nothing but the Truth, so help me GOD! Some people get it, some people know, some people are aware of the Truth, and some people just don’t get it, they don’t know, and they aren’t aware of the Truth. Some people can see and hear clearly, the scales have fallen off their eyes, and some people are still blind and deaf, and it’s not their faults, they have been brainwashed by the news and media corporations, and they have been misinformed by the politicians. Those who do go to college are not really being taught America’s TRUE history, especially in the branches of History, Government, and Political Science, so that’s why so many of We the People have been dumbed down. No, I’m not saying anyone is dumb, or stupid, because no human is really dumb or stupid. Every human has been blessed with a mind that is capable of learning, and capable of growing, but not every human is taught the right way. Some people learn faster than others, and some people learn differently than others. Some people, like myself, are more visual, and hands-on, while some people are more in need of instructions and interactive teaching. I myself can teach myself things if I don’t know how to do something, but not everyone is like me.

Why am I running for the office of President of the United States in 2012?

Well, for starters, I feel it is a duty and responsibility of mine to help turn the country around, and put her back on the right path, and once again make it a nation for the People, and by the People. I feel it a duty of mine to help form a more Perfect union. Second, though I’ve never attended any college, I have no degrees, and I’m a poor man who’s never held a political office in my life, I have indeed been blessed with a prodigious mind and a pulchritudinous heart. Yes, I REALLY am a true, bona fide genius, and if anyone doubts that, they can give me another official I.Q. test.

So my strengths are mathematics, science, logic, visual spacial aspects, technical aspects, and problem solving. My weaknesses are people skills, communication, linguistics, and behavioral aspects that some people may not agree with. Oh well, you aren’t going to find a perfect person, a perfect leader, and if my own country can’t see who it is exactly I am, and what exactly I can offer her, if my own country wants to disregard the pertinent facts about myself, and ignore the Academic Honors Diploma I received in High School, and ignore the fact that I pretty much aced every math class in school, including A.P. Calculus, and disregard the high score I received on the ASVAB test when I enlisted in the Marine Corps, and ignore the Secret Clearance I was awarded, and not take into consideration the over 16 years professional experience I have in the I.T. industry, and instead look at all my past mistakes, and look at all my weaknesses and faults, then I say the country I know, love, and serve is doomed.

It’s GOD, Country, Corps, Humanity, and at least I’m still putting GOD first!

I’m not a pretend Christian, I don’t talk the talk if I’m not walking the walk, and though I do not walk the walk like I should, and I do sin and fall short of the Glory of GOD, I at least am making a valiant effort to die DAILY to sin, pick up my cross, and follow Christ Jesus our Lord.

Now, what’s up with the planes and jets I keep seeing flying in the sky, over a small town called Kokomo, in North Central Indiana? The population here is about 50,000, and though it’s just a hop, skip, and a jump north of Indy, and about a 4 hour drive away from Chicago, this isn’t some major city. We have one small, municipal airport here.

I know I’m not the only one who sees these planes and jets flying in the sky, today the sky is so clear, there’s not a cloud in sight, so it’s kind of hard to not see the chem trails that are being left by the planes and jets. What’s really going on?

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Technical Technicalities

Posted on Saturday, March 6th, 2010 at 8:55 am in Blogging, Technology by MJB

Ah, now I can rest peacefully, I finally got some new parts to build a new system. The processor is an AMD Phenom x4, with 2 MBs of L2 cache (512k per core), and 2 MBs of L3 cache. The motherboard is an Asus M4N78 Pro, and I’m really impressed with it. The Asus Express Gate allows users to boot to a basic proprietary OS that offers the ability to get on the net, this actually bypasses Windows, so it’s definitely a good thing for people like me who may not need to boot into Windows but have to get on the net often. There’s a feature called Turbo Key that allows users to overclock the system with the touch of a button, the power button to be exact. You can also overclock it manually if you want, within the BIOS, so if you’ve got an unlocked processor, and memory that can be overclocked, you’ll love this motherboard. Onboard is the nVidia Geforce 8300 GPU, which is SLI capable, so you can utilize both the onboard GPU and the GPU from a video card combined to aid with rendering and advanced graphics aspects such as gaming and CAD. It’s also got HDMI, DVI, and VGA ports on the motherboard. I also got 4 GBs of Corsair memory (PC6400, Two 2GB sticks running in dual channel mode), so the system will have plenty of memory to utilize for games and demanding programs such as 3D Studio Max, AutoCAD, Maya, Lightwave 3D, and Creative Suite 4.

I couldn’t very well run that kind of system with my old, outdated 500 watt power supply, it’s not even an ATX 2.0 formfactor power supply, so I got a new 700 watt power supply that is ATX 2.2 / EPS 2.91 ready, with quad +12V output rails, so I don’t have to worry about running out of juice if I put all of my hard drives in there. Speaking of hard drives, I had already bought a 1 Terabyte SATA hard drive, so I put that one in there, and two 500 GB hard drives that was concatinated into one 1 Terabyte hard drive, an external one that went bad. I found out the hard way that it was the first hard drive which went bad, because it won’t recognize at all in the BIOS when I hook it up. Oh well, I guess I lost all that data that was on it, but right now I’m running a long search in File Scavenger on the second hard drive, so at least I can get whatever data is on the second one. After I copy it over to the new 1 TB hard drive, I’ll format it, and use it for more storage.

Good news though, I found out the hard way that what caused my older system to stop working was the video card. I tried putting it into the new system, and it wouldn’t power on at all. After being stumped for a few (the power light on the motherboard came on, but the system wouldn’t power on at all), I figured I’d take the video card out, and sure enough it started working from that point on. So, now all I have to get is another PCI Express video card for the new system, and another one for my older system, and I can turn the older system into my server. The system isn’t really designed to be a server, but the Athlon 64 Processor, and the 2 GBs of memory, will be alot better than the Pentium 3 processor and the 512 MBs of memory that is in my current server, the one running Wordpress, which allows me to write these blogs.

Dang, I know I probably wrote over most people’s heads, I can’t help it that I’m a computer geek, and an I.T. guru, but that’s just because I love what I do, I am very passionate about my professional career.

So yeah, I’m in a good mood right now. I’d be in a better mood if I had a woman to love on, I tell you that!

I’m not suggesting that I want to stay up under her all the time, I can do my own things, just as I’m sure she can, but it would be nice to have some conversation every once in a while. It would be nice to spend some time with a woman some time. It would be wonderful to make love to a woman every so often.

This geek hasn’t been kissed in years!

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Raw, Rugged & Rough

Posted on Friday, March 5th, 2010 at 5:41 pm in Poetry by MJB

I’ve been through stages and phases, I’ve been through growth spurts and dry spells.
Spiritual growth spurts hurt, especially when they make you feel like bloody hell.

It’s when you know you gotta get yourself right that you become a mature adult.
I admit my weaknesses and confess my sins, I’m not trying to be rude or insult.

I’m not where I should be, and not where I want to be, but I’m going to keep trying.
I can’t help it that I’m emotional, it’s not my fault that I can’t stop myself from crying.

Sometimes it’s tears of sorrow, and sometimes it’s tears of joy, but I write poetry to vent.
I’m not trying to impress anyone, I’m just trying to express myself creatively, and repent.

I don’t have time to play games, I’m still trying to find love, because I want to know what love is.
I can’t explain it to you in any other way, I’m really trying hard to remain about our Father’s biz.

My faith in Him is strong, I KNOW He’s going to come through, I know this one prayer will come true.
Then I won’t be so frustrated, I’ll be patient, I’ll be full of love, joy, and peace, and I’ll excel in all I do.

Sometimes I struggle with writing what I am thinking and feeling, sometimes I can’t get it out fast enough.
On the inside I’m gentle, loving, and kind, but there are times when I can be blunt, raw, rugged, and rough.

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Mixed Up Romance

Posted on Friday, March 5th, 2010 at 4:45 pm in Romance by MJB

I’m just going to put this out there.

Actually, I want to take on a woman’s personality, and her mental and emotional aspects.

No, I’m not looking for friends, I’ve got enough friends. I’m not looking for friends with benefits. I’m looking for love, I’m not going to play with a woman’s mind and heart. It just so happens that some women want to play with my mind and heart, but I’m not going to play those immature cat and mouse games. You either are attracted to me, and want to know more about me, or you’re playing a game, and want to use and abuse me. You either love me, or you hate me, there’s no in-between.

All I know is, while I see so many men treating women badly, and not caring about their emotions, and only wanting one thing from her, I actually want and need to treat just ONE special woman the right way, with respect, with dignity, with honor, with gentleness, with a kind heart, and a pure, GODLY love. Our Heavenly Father created me this way, I’m not just running game, I’m not some pimp or player, I’m just sick and tired of being lonely.

Do I need to get myself right? Of course! Do I have things I need to change about myself? Absolutely! Are there skills I need to improve upon, and weaknesses I need to strengthen? Certainly! Am I all the way there yet? No, obviously I’m not.

But like I keep saying, I’d sure be a better man, and I’d sure be alot more full of the Love, Joy, and Peace of GOD, if only I had that companionship and intimacy that I really do need, and definitely deserve. If only I was able to love one special woman as Christ loves His Church, and be loved by one special woman, one who would be submissive to me (not that I’m saying I’d tell her what to do, but she should honor my spiritual position as head of the household, which isn’t based on financial status or anything else, but how the hierarchial structure of a family unit is suppose to be, especially one that puts GOD first), I’d be better able to focus, and I wouldn’t have to keep writing about love and romance, or lack thereof. I could actually concentrate on staying about our Father’s Business, I could actually stay motivated, and remain high functioning. Yes, if I were married, I’d be one of the happiest, most loved, most loving, most generous people on the face of this earth.

Well, maybe one day I won’t have to write this, I can prove this with ACTIONS, not words. Maybe one day I won’t have to vent to my sister, and feel like maybe I was rude with her, because I’m very frustrated right now.

So I’m in a mixed state, but that doesn’t mean I’m not able to articulate what I am thinking and feeling. I get tongue tied, I stumble on words when I am in this state of mind, and this mood, because I have all these thoughts and emotions in me, and my mind is moving faster than my lips do.

Nevertheless, writing what I am thinking and feeling helps me clear my head, just as walking helps me clear my head.

So yeah, I’ll say it just like I said it earlier. I do love myself unconditionally, but I am aware of my weaknesses and shortcomings as well. I can strive to improve upon myself, I can examine my conscience often, and stay repentant before the Lord, that doesn’t mean I don’t love myself. Maybe I said it wrong when I said that it’s kind of hard to love yourself when what you need to make you whole and complete is the love of a woman, but no woman seems to want to love you that way. Maybe my sister is right when she said that most women are looking for certain things when it comes to marriage, maybe security is important to women. Very well! Just like I said it to her, if a woman can’t see what the Lord has been doing in my life, if her faith isn’t strong enough to know that our Heavenly Father will ALWAYS provide for His children (the riches of the wicked are laid up for the righteous), then I really wouldn’t want to marry her anyways.

Maybe most women are frightened by a man who’s so open and honest with his thoughts and emotions, and has blind faith. Maybe most women are scared of getting hurt, but I am too! I’ve been hurt my whole life, I’ve been used, abused, taken advantage of, my kindheartedness counted as a weakness, and my love taken for granted. Oh well, I wanna give it another try! I wanna fall in love again! I don’t want to live in this cold, dark world full of evil, greed, corruption, pride, arrogance, selfishness, and self-centeredness all alone.

So this nice guy is tired of finishing last. I’m not trying to force it, I’m not trying to go outside of GOD’S Will, and I know His Timing is always perfect, but I do pray He come through quickly, because I know, as He does, I’d be a much better person if I was married. Then I could focus on being about our Heavenly Father’s Business, and I wouldn’t have to question why it is that the nice guys always finish last. The day that prayer is answered, the day that I get married (I’m straight up serious, I’m not running game, I’m not just saying what women want to hear) will be the day I celebrate and rejoice in a way I have not yet done.

Will I let the enemy steal my Joy in the Lord?

No, absolutely not!

I’ll continue to encourage myself in the Lord!

I’d be honored if some special woman out there actually wanted me to encourage her in the Lord as well.

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